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    deathkeeper


    Posts : 7
    Join date : 2010-10-20

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    Post by deathkeeper on Thu Oct 21, 2010 3:59 am

    im bound from love through day and night and i am afread of what might im so scarred of what will happen im just afread of what can be mistakem i dont need love i dont need faith but when it comes to the end i still dont have a date i dont want love i just want might to stand up for what is right,
    love is true love is great its also so much like a milky way in the senter is something soft and sensere but on the out side there is a concoction of something mean and cruel but in the end it is worth it for her truth

    <3 death knight
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    Pinkbutterflies


    Posts : 6
    Join date : 2010-10-18
    Location : Western Australia

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    Post by Pinkbutterflies on Thu Oct 21, 2010 4:05 am

    That's lovely sweetie....You've got the poets bug now...Keep reading, writing and learning...Loving your stuff....xx
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    Harklight


    Posts : 77
    Join date : 2010-10-13

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    Post by Harklight on Fri Oct 22, 2010 12:27 am

    I really enjoyed the depths of tones in this write, Chris. It also has a good moral.
    Your rhythm suits stanzas for free form poetry. I'm happy to help with format,
    punctuation and using spell-checker. I'll send you a PM.

    It's wonderful that you used the "Milky Way" metaphor in this second part.
    Keep reading poetry, learning and writing. I'll read more from you. H x

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