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    Speak of Seeds and Moments

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    Jamie


    Posts : 74
    Join date : 2010-10-12

    default Speak of Seeds and Moments

    Post by Jamie on Wed Nov 24, 2010 12:11 pm

    Seeds born of passion take root, creativity
    Feeds, fertilizes to bring forth the blooms,
    Moments we'll recognize best retroactively:
    Unbidden memories in lonely rooms.

    Left to our musings alone, we're left withering
    Shadows of ideas who've not found a voice--
    Muses muse best when encouraged by nurturing
    Longings and loves; make each moment a choice.

    Musings and muses both spring from necessity,
    Passions unrivaled, and dreams cast aside,
    Longings from recesses of our vitality;
    Musings and muses gain strength from our lives.
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    Harklight


    Posts : 77
    Join date : 2010-10-13

    default Re: Speak of Seeds and Moments

    Post by Harklight on Thu Dec 09, 2010 3:20 pm

    I can relate to this, Jamie. Your word-play with musings, muses and muse is clever and mildly amusing. To avoid using "left" twice, you could re-phrase that line. While some end line rhymes feel forced and punctuation could be polished, your poem speaks well of universal creativity: from inception through processes that embellish the finished bloom. I also like that you've included life experience elements, which often affect our endeavors to begin and complete works. This is a stand-out for me: "Muses muse best when encouraged by nurturing". Good work, Harklight x

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