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daring lotus bloom
vibrant pink on flexing stalk--
once rigid, it glows
collapsing in quenched passion
fulfilled crimson flame recedes
~~~~~~
Copyright © 2010
2 posters
Fire On Water
Harklight
- Posts : 77
Join date : 2010-10-13
daring lotus bloom
vibrant pink on flexing stalk--
once rigid, it glows
collapsing in quenched passion
fulfilled crimson flame recedes
~~~~~~
Copyright © 2010
Jamie- Posts : 74
Join date : 2010-10-12
I love the lush word choice here, Harklight. The title could not be more perfect. In the Tanka itself lies a vibrant rendition of the lotus' life-cycle, in perfect form (smart to use "glows"). The sounding of the poem aloud is also quite enjoyable. Reputation to you!
Harklight- Posts : 77
Join date : 2010-10-13
It's my fav tanka that I've written, Jamie. I appreciate your comments. +Thanks to you.